Crackdown...right after this!

"It's a beautiful day. I'm sitting in an arcade, popcorn and old cheese smells wafting through the air, the thunder of tiny feet running to and fro amid the various attractions."


I started this review a while ago, then got distracted by something. I can't tell you if it was shiny or not, but I can tell you that I now have no idea where I was going with this opening, quoted above.

Crackdown and the Grand Theft Auto series are basically my brother and I circa age 12. Identical twins experiencing the classical Erik Erikson stages of development Identity Crisis. Crackdown reacted normally with the main exception of changing for the sake of standing out from its twin. Choosing the meatball sub when he'd really prefer the Cold Cut Trio. If this convoluted metaphor is confusing, don't worry. I'm confused too.

Crackdown is a sandbox GTA spiritual successor, in that you are on the "other" side of the Law in a near future dystopian future city. I hesitate to use the term "right", as if my conduct in game is any indication, citizens of Pacific City would be paralyzed with fear, living where getting mowed down in a drive by is just as likely as your minivan getting a cybernetically enhanced roundhouse kick into the bay. As the sole effective agent of this future police force, you've been given the ability/jurisdiction to bring the criminal elements of the city to justice(death) with a prejudice several kilometers beyond "extreme." You take down lieutenants of the three gangs, a loose Hispanic association, a Eastern European industrial complex, and a hold no bars high tech vaguely Asian megacorp, complete with 6-wheeled SUVs and enough rocket launchers that they must be in league with NASA or something.

One of the main ways Crackdown differs from the GTA series is by introducing skill advancement that goes beyond "get the next biggest gun." Using your various skills gives you corresponding experience in certain fields. Using guns raises your firearms skill, blowing bad guys up raises your explosives skill, and tearing through the streets running down criminals in cars, traveling at speeds that can conservatively described as "catastrophic" raises the driving skill. With each level of skill comes the unsurprising increase in ability: guns become more accurate, you can jump higher, and dropkick suckers further. This provides you with more options when you fail a mission than "try again, stupid."Also, with the removal of any missions, you are simply left with targets to bump into at the grocery story and take down or, more often than not, ignored completely.

Therein lies the major problem with Crackdown. The whole target system gives the thing a terrific lack of urgency. The only real reason for taking down the bosses is to clear out an area so that you can get back to the real important part of the game: hopping gaily from rooftop to rooftop, or setting up jump ramps, or just driving around really fast. It's like in the good ol' days when your Mom would tell you to go clean up your room. Your room that is filled with toys. It's very hard to stay on task, and the complete lack of empathy for the citizens (as they'd have to possess a sense of self preservation to be considered alive), if you take out the people you're indifferent to or that are trying to kill you, all that's left is you, faffing about in a ruined, probably post-apoctalyptic city alone(finally!), owing your bizarre leaping skills to radioactive mutations.

I guess that is a rather weak complaint. I should be thankful that it gives you the choice between a mediocre justice simulator and a pretty fantastic running and jumping really high extravaganza. There's plenty of other things to point out, like the maxing out of weapon power 1/3 of the way through, or the complete lack of medkits/painkillers/white magic, or the endgame difficulty curve pulling an inverted Uncanny Valley Empathy move on you.

At its heart, Crackdown is a competent superhero sandbox game. Think an anime retooling of The Punisher with a dash of Speed Racer and you're there. If you like "there" stay and jump around, otherwise, move on.